Game Girl

Well, at least they haven't given up, right? I mean, hey, things could be a lot worse -- our team could have gone out yesterday and laid a serious egg against the Jags ala last year's end-of-season meltdown versus the Giants! And, as a bonus, at least we're getting to see how some of these young guys we've been hiding on the practice squad can play. So there's that.

But it IS a drag, isn't it? I'm standing at the Cross Street Market in Baltimore with my husband's family, our kids, and about a thousand rabid Ravens fans on Christmas Eve, and I'm thinking, how LUCKY are these people that their team is moving on to the post-season. Meaningful games in January...what a concept. Something we've not seen around here in a long time. Not since that awful loss to the Seahawks a few years back...or the other crappy loss to the Bucs when our hopes were dashed on a fluke/bad call (I still HATE that Mike Alstott, by the way!)

I know, I know, it's a process. It takes time. We'll get there eventually. But will we, really? Has Shanahan really righted the ship here, or is it all just more band-aids and scotch tape? I had hoped we'd have a better feel for the direction this team is headed by this point in the season. After one full off-season, a draft, OTA's, training camp and a full season under our belt, wouldn't you think we'd at least see some progress? Instead, we've had more of the same. Drama, drama, drama. Haynesworth. McNabb. Kyle Shanahan, who I personally think seems like a real jerk. I've lost that lovin' feeling for our leaders, and I'm nervous about the future.

I could live with another non-playoff season if I knew we were at least headed in the right direction. Maybe I'll feel better if we beat the Giants and knock them out of the playoffs.

It's a start, right?

Remember all those posts I wrote about how different the Shanahan era was starting to look? How nice it finally was to have some real professionals running the show out at Redskins Park? How we were no longer a league-wide laughing stock, and that win or lose, at least our organization was starting to take a turn for the better?

Well, forget I said ANY of that. The benching of McNabb, and particularly, the HANDLING of the benching of McNabb, speaks volumes about this new regime. And it doesn't bode well for the future as far as I am concerned. Guess what, folks? This regime and its leadership is not any different from the legions of idiots before them. The media "leaks". The benching on Thursday NIGHT before a Sunday game (after 2 practices!) Hey, the earlier benching during the final two minutes of the Detroit game. I mean, why even bother keeping McNabb around at all, since they obviously don't believe he can play a snap in this offense anymore. Or maybe they never thought he could.

So why, then, did they bring him here in the first place? Why give up two draft picks for a guy you think can't play? And now, with Grossman's semi-decent second-half play on Sunday, I guess Shanahan can puff out his chest and say to his critics, "See, I was right. McNabb was the problem."

Actually, Coach, I think YOU are the problem. You gave up two critical draft picks our organization can ill-afford to lose on a quarterback you now think isn't competent to run your vaunted offense. Really? Seems like someone didn't do his homework very well last off-season. McNabb is McNabb. He's ALWAYS been this way. A long bomb down field followed by a few short, ugly passes into the dirt. A scramble for a first down. A sly smile and a touchdown pass. He's inconsistent. Any Redskin fan worth his salt could have told you that.

So bringing him here is on YOU, Coach Shanahan. Stop trying to make McNabb the scapegoat for your bad decision-making. McNabb hasn't changed. He still gives you all he's got. He's a leader. A team-player. And a real class act.

He deserves better. And so do we. What a shame. Same crap, different regime.

The party is most definitely over. And thank goodness it is. I'm tired! This particular party guest has officially had enough. Let's call it a day and try again next year.

You know what's odd? I feel strangely relieved...you know what I mean? I'm actually sort of glad the season has officially ended (well, for all intents and purposes, anyway). Now I can just relax, turn on the TV on Sundays, and just watch football. No more pain and anxiety. No more yelling. No more hysteria or misery. Now, it's just football for football's sake.

Let's see how this team plays when the pressure is off. Let's see what kind of talent, character and leadership we really have. What kind of people and players these guys are. How our coaches handle these last 3 games.

now is when the real work starts, at least for this coaching staff. How will they fill the many holes on this team this off-season? How will they motivate aging veterans like Santana Moss who are just so, so tired of losing? How will they change the culture?

I have a million questions. But for now, I'm just going to relax, put my feet up, and enjoy the game. Phew!

Don't let the door hit you on the way out of town, Albert. And don't come back!

Yes, as I have stated previously, I think this situation could have been handled better from the get-go by Shanahan and Allen, but the fact is, they rolled the dice and lost. Happens to the best of us. They tried to make lemonade out of lemons by keeping Haynesworth around and attempting to motivate him by appealing to his "conscience", his so-called "work ethic", and his "love of the game" of football. But they found out the hard way what so many others -- especially those in Tennessee -- already knew: that Haynesworth isn't motivated by ANY of those things. He's not even motivated by money...gobs of it. More money than 99.8 % of people will ever see in their lifetime. Dude couldn't even get his butt in gear for 40 MILLION dollars. Wow. Talk about spoiled, entitled athletes.

But whatever. Shanahan tried. His teammates tried. The defensive coaches tried. OK, so we don't know the whole story. Who said what to whom. But here's what we DO know: we know Haynesworth didn't want to play in the "3-4" defense (if that is the defense this team is even running). We know he didn't want to train in the off-season with his teammates. We know he didn't (or WOULDN'T) give his all on every play each and every time he was on the field. We know he sure had a lot of "issues" for a rich guy living the dream of playing in the NFL.

So, as Shanahan said yesterday, it was just time. Time to cut our losses and take our lumps for the biggest free-agent bust of all time, at least where the game of football is concerned.

What happens now? Well, I for one certainly hope we can wipe the slate clean. Learn from our mistakes. Take a good, hard look at where all this ridiculous obsession with free agency has gotten this franchise...staring down another 5-11 season with mediocre talent, overpaid past-their-prime stars and a whole lot of disgruntled fans. Pay attention, Dan Snyder -- this means YOU! Remember when you said you had learned "patience" from Joe Gibbs? Well, funny how after he left, you went out and signed the world's most selfish, entitled player to join our team. Raced down to TN in your plane like the world was on fire to get him as soon as the market bell clanged. Brought him here on a bloated contract and watched as he tried to destroy this team and this franchise. Stole your money -- and not just your money. MY money. The fans' money. We pay for all those jerseys, those tickets, those beers at the stadium. And YOU, Dan Snyder, squandered our money on the worst personnel move anyone has ever witnessed.

Here's hoping we have finally hit rock-bottom. Maybe we can finally starting heading in the right direction.

Happy now, Haynesworth?

Well, I've officially had enough. Enough of the pain and suffering. Enough of the embarrasment. Enough of the angst. Last week I said I wished this team would make up it's mind and decide which direction it was going in -- either decide to be good or be bad and just be done with it. But maybe I was too hasty. Because they must have heard my plea, and decided to go with "bad". Yuck.

How many ways can I write about my disgust with losing? Week after week, I'm singing the same damn tune. We need a better pass rush. Our offensive line is, to coin a phrase, offensive. McNabb is inconsistent, and it doesn't help when his receivers continually drob passes. Our special teams are up and down. We just can't get out of our own way.

Today was something else, wasn't it? When the Giants drove down the field on their opening possession and scored that touchdown as easily as you can say 1-2-3, well, I knew it was going to be a bad day. I'm actually surprised the final score was as low as it was, considering how porous our defense was and how many times we turned the ball over (6, if you're counting).

When that first Giants drive was finished, and the cameras flashed on Haslett and his one-word expletive (four letters, first one is an "f"), that pretty much summed it all up, didn't it? And while we're on the subject of dear old Haslett, does anyone else think his days are numbered? And if they're not, don't you think they should be! Why on EARTH did he come in here and take the one semi-strength of our awful team from last year -- our defense -- and turn it upside down, inside out, and proceed to essentially wreck it in the process?

And to add insult to injury, why are we benching Albert Haynesworth when we need him so desperately? What kind of point is Shanahan trying to make -- that being late to a meeting won't be tolerated? How about losing to our freakin' division rival in an embarrassing fashion...how about not tolerating THAT?? The NFL isn't the place to teach grown men life-lessons. That's not what I'm paying for as a fan. It's not what I'm watching this team for, either. It's great that London Fletcher is such a nice, classy guy. But would it matter to me if he wasn't? Not particularly. He's such a great player, I'd be willing to settle for him being less than perfect as long as he continues to produce on the field.

Seriously, what is to become of this Redskin team this year? And what about next year? And the years to come? I'm beginning to think this whole team is cursed. From our crappy stadium to our horrible gaffes and bad luck on the field, we are simply a franchise in disarray. Sure, we all thought Shanahan was going to have his hands full when he got here. But didn't you think he'd at least have us heading in the right direction by now?

Did you really think this team would be this bad off?

and you know the rest. Sigh. I'm getting so tired of this very non-linear process we are going through with this team. We're up. We're down. We're winning. We're losing. We're in overtime. We win -- jubilation! We lose -- agony. Questions. LOTS of angst.

WHAT is the deal with this team? I listened closely to the local sports talk jibba jabba today (I can't really deal with the national pundits, except when we win), and not surprisingly, they sound as confused as the rest of us these days.

Some say this team simply isn't very good. Others say we're heading in the right direction and just need a few more good players to push us into future playoff contention. Some are in Shanahan's corner, others seem to think he's a horrible personnel guy who's going to lead us into disaster ala our old pal Vinnie. Fans calling in today sounded perplexed, too. Some support the team, Shanahan and McNabb. Others want to blow the whole thing up (ACK!) and start from scratch. Again.

Where do I net out? Honestly, I'm just not sure. I was truly beside myself after that loss yesterday. Believe it or not, I think I was more upset over this loss than the one to the Eagles! This loss was close. But not really. This loss meant more, because we had a chance to pull closer to the Giants and Eagles and generate a winning record. This loss, quite frankly, pissed me off.

I was angry. I think I actually lost my voice from screaming at the TV so much. I mean, talk about the agony of defeat...when that Brandon Banks' touchdown run was called back, I nearly threw myself into the TV headfirst.

Enough, Redskins. Pick a side. Start trending "good" or "bad" so I can get on board and go with it. Either we're going to be good this year or we're not, so let's just get on with it already.

I don't have much energy left anymore.

Well, that was better, wasn't it? After the debacle against the Eagles on Monday Night Football last week, I was not exactly sure which team was going to show up yesterday against the Titans. The team that got "Vicked" on national television, or the one that looked like it was finally starting to come together before that weird benching of McNabb during the Detroit game a few weeks back.

THIS team pulled out a somewhat miraculous win yesterday, considering all of the injuries they endured before and during the game. (Jeez, anyone remember the body-bag game of '91?) THIS team -- down to it's last offensive lineman by the middle of the third quarter -- only gave up 3 sacks and gave McNabb a ton of time to throw the ball downfield. THIS team didn't get burned by Randy Moss, beat in the middle of the field on the short passing game, or give up a back-breaking fourth-down touchdown (THANK YOU for the push-off, Moss, and thanks to the refs for finally giving us a call!)

The team we saw against the Titans showed grit. Effort. Desire to win. They didn't quit after getting their butts kicked last week, even after the media and many fans began to question their unity and ability. They pulled together.

Was it coaching? Players working together? A fluke? I guess only time will tell. This week isn't going to be any easier...we've got the Vikings coming to town sporting a new head coach in Leslie Frazier. Seems like every time we play a team with a new coach, a new quarterback, or some other new wrinkle, we fall short. Remember that loss to Detroit last year against rookie Matt Stafford? Or that Rams quarterback from Harvard who had never taken an NFL snap? OK, I don't want to keep opening up old wounds, but seriously, we never seem to be able to adjust our game-plan when things change on the fly. Over and over again, we've lost to teams with new players, new systems, rookies coming off the bench, etc. So let's hope this week's mojo doesn't disappear.

But at least that Monday Night disaster is starting to become a distant memory!

Dear God, what a shellacking! Last night's game against the Eagles (can we even call it a game? Was the outcome EVER in doubt after the first play from scrimmage??) was such a debacle I'm not quite sure where to start. How about I begin by saying that for the first time ever, I actually turned off the Redskins game before it ended. And that is saying something.

I didn't quit during any of the Spurrier disasters. During the Patriots beat-down. Not even after the "swining gate" game of the Zorn-era. I have watched every single humiliating play, every bungled snap, every sack, fumble and strip-for-a-score we've had to endure around here since the good ole days of the 1991 season when I was in college and was so optimistic and naive, I thought things would be forever rosy...boy, did I have a lot to learn!

But last night, I simply couldn't take any more. It was bad enough to watch our defense get gashed, our offense sputter, and our coaches look befuddled. But to have to endure the obnoxious trio of Gruden (of whom I USED to be a huge fan of, until last night), Jaws and Tirico (whom I NEVER could stand, and last night sealed the deal) gush over Michael Vick and basically mock our team, players and entire organization...well, it was all too much.

I told you, didn't I? We ALWAYS lay an egg on national television. I believe, if I'm not mistaken, that Patriots debacle was a night game, too, wasn't it? Well, doesn't much matter. There've been enough others. See my post earlier yesterday -- I referenced Baltimore, Pittsburg and Dallas as games I could remember off the top of my head during which we embarrassed ourselves royally on national TV.

But really, wasn't last night just the worst game you can ever remember having to sit through? Maybe it was so spectacularly bad because we were all lulled into thinking that with Shanahan, Allen and McNabb at the helm, our team was actually headed in the right direction this year. Boy, I'll bet last night certainly cured you of that notion, didn't it? If that wasn't an indication that the way we've done business around here for, oh, the last 20 years simply DOESN'T WORK, then I don't know what would be.

It was bad. Oh, it was bad. So bad I had to walk out of the room on more than one occasion. So bad I refused to read any stuff coming over the twitter line or the Post Insider site. So bad I wouldn't answer any of the consoling texts coming my way. So bad I yelled at my husband, cursed more forcefully at the TV than I can ever remember, and threw things across the room. So bad, I had to actually quit watching. I just couldn't do it anymore.

So, where do we go from here? I'd love to say we go on to soundly thump Tenessee this weekend to make up for our misery, but really, how can anyone even say something like that after last night's performance? We'll be lucky to make it out of the season with any more wins at this rate.

Shhh...if you listen closely, you can just make out the faint sounds of hysterical laughter. Sounds like Jim Zorn, Steve Spurrier, Marty, and even Joe Gibbs to me. Even they never had it this bad!

I have no idea which team is going to show up for tonight's re-match with the Eagles. The team who totally dominated the Eagles back in early October during their first meeting...or the team who went out with a fizzle before the bye week with a loss to Detroit. That loss, by the way, looks even more depressing now, doesn't it? Yikes!

In any event, the fact that Donovan McNabb's agent is in town to supposedly garner a contract extention for his client today may signal that the turmoil and messiness surrounding McNabb's benching is firmly in the rearview. Or, it could just be a smoke screen, designed to get the monkey off Shanahan's back before another nationally-televised game tonight. Maybe they send the guy packing after the lights go out at Fed Ex Field tonight, and McNabb continues to play in the limbo-land he's been in for some time now.

Who ever knows with this team? For a while, as you know, I was so optimistic about our team, our leadership, our mojo, if you will. But now, I'm back to the basics -- feeling nervous, anxious and downright baffled about who this team is and what they are capable of. Back to crossing my fingers, closing my eyes, cringing, and yelling at the TV.

What I do know for sure is this: we've had a history of laying major eggs on national TV in the past few years. Those shellackings against Baltimore and Pittsburg still sting, don't they? So, I'm keeping my fingers crossed that tonight looks better. That our team comes to play. That McNabb has finally "grasped the offense", whatever that means.

Please, let's not get embarrassed again in front of millions tonight!

Yesterday might be just a bad loss for the Redskins, who could (emphasis on COULD) go on to fix what ails them and redeem themselves this season. Or -- and I sincerely hope and pray this isn't the case -- yesterday could signal the beginning of the end for this season, and maybe the entire Shanahan era.

I can't believe I'm even writing this, considering I've been such a fan of Shanahan since he arrived here back in January and considering how large and in charge he has seemed since his coaching debut. I mean, until the last five minutes of the game yesterday, I was so optimistic that this team was headed in the right direction that I started to forget about the angst we've all had to endure up until this point...the misery, the fear, the worry that our team was headed in the wrong direction, by people in charge who didn't know what they were doing. Until yesterday's benching of McNabb, I had begun to put all that pain and suffering in the rear view and focus on enjoying football games again.

But then, I watched in dismay and anger and total disbelief as Rex Grossman -- REX GROSSMAN -- ran onto the field with the game on the line in the final two minutes of the game yesterday at the urging of his coaching staff, who apparently traded 2 drafts picks for a quarterback they clearly don't trust when the going gets tough. They pulled McNabb out when it mattered most, and then they stood there after the game was lost (which of course, it was, in truly UGLY fashion!) and said they thought McNabb wasn't as smart or capable as Grossman. WHAT??

How is this even remotely possible? How, in the space of 5 minutes at the end of a horrible game in Detroit, could Shanahan and his staff have fallen so far, so fast? Don't they realize the implications of the decision they made? Do they have any clue at all about the can of worms they just opened by pulling their starting quarterback -- a future Hall-of-Famer -- in favor of a washed-up 2nd stringer who coughed up the ball on his first play from scrimmage and wound up costing us the game (and possibly the season?)

This isn't Denver, folks. Or Houston. Things like this don't just fly under the radar here. This is the big leagues. Within 15 minutes after the final whistle, the words "quarterback controversy" had been uttered on every network and radio station both locally and nationally. This was major. Big time. A serious decision that goes WAY beyond winning or losing to Detroit. This decision goes to the heart of their personnel management abilities, their coaching acumen, their leadership. A decision like this, made recklessly, can lose or divide or RUIN a locker room. This is not something to be taken lightly.

I am hoping it was just a mistake. Something Shanahan and his son will revisit today and realize was an impulsive decision made in the heat of battle. I'm hoping they will come out today and apologize, say they made a mistake, and restore order and unity to the team and the fan base. Put McNabb back in charge of the offense where he belongs and let him lead by example. I'm hoping they squelch this "controversy" talk before it does further damage to the team they have been building with such painstaking care.

Stay tuned. If they don't...well, things are starting to look a lot different than I thought.

OK, so the Redskins won yesterday. Hooray! I am thrilled about the win, and excited about their surprising record at 4-3. At this point, they have as many wins under their belt as they did ALL of last season, which is pretty amazing (and a testament to how truly awful they were last year!)

But I can't break down the game today, or discuss the 4 interceptions by DeAngelo Hall, or laugh about what a terrible quarterback Jay Cutler is. Nope, I've got nothing today. Why?

Because I faced a serious mommy/fan dilemma yesterday, and I know many of you can relate. Here goes: as I have stated repeatedly, I am a ridiculous fan of this team. So ridiculous that I never, EVER leave the house on game-day, or if I have to leave, I make sure there is a TV wherever I'm going so I can watch the game (or listen to it on the radio, at the very least). In any event, you get the point. Game day is MY day. I'm off-duty as a mom for the 4 hours or so the game is being played. I don't make lunches, do laundry, open the mail, or even answer the phone. My kids, who are 4 and 8, know about my obsession with the Skins and frankly, they tend to steer clear of me on game days, which is unfortunate as I wish my little guy, at least, would watch with me and catch some of my Skins fanaticism. But I digress.

Let's just say I schedule my Sundays around the Redskins, and I don't feel the least bit guilty about it. As I have also repeatedly said, some women talk on the phone, some women shop or work out...I watch the Redskins. It's my thing. It's what I do. As my husband often says, there are worse hobbies I could take up.

So, how, you ask, did I find myself at a 5-year-old's birthday party in the middle of the second quarter of the Bear's game yesterday? It's a sad tale of woe, and one I'm not eager to repeat. My husband had to go to a funeral yesterday unexpectedly (so that gets HIM off the hook), which left me to shuttle my four-year-old to his little pal's birthday party. "No sweat," I'm thinking, "I'll just drop him off and listen to the game in the car, then pick him up and get home in time to see the fourth quarter."

Good plan, until...OH, the horror! It was NOT a drop-and-go kind of party. Imagine my surprise when I walked into the backyard, saw the moonbounce and the party favors, and ALL the other moms standing around chatting about pre-school, potty training, and all sorts of other unimportant mommy-based issues. Catch me on a Monday and I'll chat with you all you want about potty training. Talk to me during the Redskins game about potty training and I might try to hit you in the mouth.

So, there I was, trapped...standing in a strangers' backyard, nodding my head amidst all the mommy chatter and frantically thinking, "What's the score? Why, oh why, didn't I set the DVR before I left the house? I only set it for the Comcast postgame show. Didn't think I'd NEED to set it for the game..." And on and on and on.

So, for the first time in I don't know how long, I missed the game. Simply MISSED it. Yes, I was able to excuse myself every now and then to fire up the radio in my car and check the score, and I watched the box score on my iphone, but it wasn't the same. I missed the game. I missed the nuances that make up those 3 1/2 hours on game day. I have to be content with highlights, post-game analysis, and the re-telling of stories from others.

But it won't be the same. And why? Because I faced a serious mommy-dilemma. Did I mention there wasn't a man in sight at that birthday party yesterday? Nope, they were all home watching the game.

UGH!

Well, we lost. To the Colts. At home. During primetime. But you know what? I don't feel so badly about the whole thing. I mean, yes, would I prefer to have beaten Peyton Manning on that last drive with 2 minutes to go in the fourth quarter last night? Would that have been a statement that all of the changes this team has endured since last January are finally starting to pay off? (And would it have spurred on those contract extension talks for Donovan McNabb a little bit?) Yes, of course. But there is no shame in losing the way we did last night. As Joe Gibbs was so fond of saying, we fought "our guts out". I'll say it again, and I'm starting to sound like a broken record, I know, so bear with me here: this team has HEART! They competed until the bitter end last night. They were in that game all the way through the fourth quarter. And you know why they lost? They beat THEMSELVES!

That's right. It wasn't Manning's arm or Dwight Freeney's spin moves that killed us last night, although both were a factor. What really hurt us was, well, US! We dropped 3 more interceptions which could have stopped the Colts from scoring. If we catch even ONE of these, we win. We missed a long but still make-able field goal, and if we make it, we at least tie and force an overtime. We had ample opportunities to put that game away last night, and we squandered every single one.

So yes, a loss is a bummer. But this loss, in particular, gives me pause, and dare I say, hope...because we didn't get blown out by a superior team. No, we kept ourselves from winning through our own inability to put the Colts in the rearview. We lost to a team with whom we were evenly matched. Our team needs to learn how to win those close games. We need to learn how to put our foot on the jugular of our opponent, even a team like the Colts, and keep the pressure on.

And we've GOT to learn to catch those interceptions!!!

When the Redskins win a game on Sunday, doesn't it just totally and completely make your week? I mean, come on...isn't it just more fun to go to work and face that obnoxious Cowboy (or Raven, or Steeler, or insert-team-name here) fan when our team has beaten our opponent, no matter how ugly the win?

It's sad to say, but I personally just feel BETTER in general when the Redskins win. I'm nicer to my kids, kinder to my husband, more inclined to watch my tongue with the annoying volunteer lady at my daughter's school or that neighbor borrowing yet another cup of something at 7 o'clock in the morning. I'm less frantic to get into my car to listen ad nauseum to the sports talk radio dudes dissect the game, less worried about what the national sports analysts are saying about our team.

It's weird, isn't it? You would think I'd feel the opposite -- that I'd be more interested in what the media has to say about the Skins when they win, but while I love to hear the joyous mayhem on the phone lines on sports talk radio after the game and the following day(s), I'm less likely to sit in my car and listen endlessly to "one more thing" when they win than when they lose. It's almost as though when they win, I can just relax and move on with the rest of my life. But when they lose, well, the angst just goes on and on.

And so, this week has been a week free of anxiety. Full of fun, happiness and contentment. I'm free of the agony, at least for a little while. I'm not worried just yet about the Colts, Peyton Manning's arm, or Dwight Freeney's crazy spin move. Those worries are for Saturday and Sunday.

Today, I smile. I soak it in. I embrace...victory Monday!

Well, perhaps Mike Shanahan knows what he's doing. Maybe getting rid of some of last years' players -- the over-paid and the under-achieving -- was a good idea after all. I've been a bit of a naysayer as far as some of our illustrious coach's roster moves are concerned, going all the way back to OTA's and the release of fan-favorites like Ladell Betts, Rock Cartright, et al. Up to and including Saturday's surprising release of Devin Thomas.

But I have to admit, this team is playing with conviction and with heart, two things sorely lacking under the Jim Zorn regime and even somewhat MIA during Joe Gibbs' tenure, so heck, what do I know? Maybe some of the old players from the teams of old just weren't going to be able to get it done in this new era. I'm just a fan watching from the stands and from my couch, week in and week out. And what I see is improvement. Belief. Hope. A team that last year, probably would have folded their tent along about the third quarter of yesterday's game and gone home...but this year, they fought back. STORMED back, actually. And utilized the new regime's new players to do it!

From Anthony Armstrong to Brandon Banks -- newbies playing with fire and intensity, to wily old vets like London Fletcher and Laron Landry (what a BEAST that guy is!), this team is comprised of new players with a fresh attitude, plus old hold-overs from last year with a new lease on life.

I'm liking what I see. How about Clinton Portis cheering on his team from the sideline while leaning on his crutches? Or Brian Orakpo dancing on the sidelines after Gano's kick sailed into the end zone? I can remember many a game in the recent past where players sat on the sidelines during a losing effort and laughed...joked and LAUGHED with their teammates! Not this group. They are working together, cheering each other on, pulling for one another. It's really something special.

We fans have always said this team needed a major attitude adjustment, kinda like I say to my 8-year-old from time to time. And we're definitely seeing a sea change happening at every level of this once-dysfunctional organization. Bruce Allen has picked some good players (and gotten rid of some dead-weight), and Mike Shanahan is getting them to play like a team. Win or lose, this team is on to something...and I'm glad I'm along for the ride.

A brief jump away from the world of football...today I walked in the Race For the Cure event to end breast cancer, and while those who know me best know I usually shy away from these kinds of events, I must say today was a very special day.

I am officially four years cancer-free after a second round of breast cancer following the birth of my adorable son Tilghman (see photos above!), and today, walking with the more than 35,000 other supporters and survivors of this terrible disease, I discovered a wonderful sense of comfort and pride that truly brought tears to my eyes. And I'm not really much of a crier.

Wearing my pink survivor's shirt and marching arm-in-arm with some of my dear friends this morning, I realized I have been extremely fortunate to have been able to put the fear and anguish of my cancer diagnosis firmly in the rearview mirror and move forward into the future with joy and peace. I rarely, if ever, think about the days when I had no hair, when I was sick from the chemo, when I despaired of ever seeing my children graduate from high school.

Today, I am strong, healthy, and positive in my belief that I am a survivor who WILL be around to see my kids graduate, to grow old with my dear husband, and yes, to cheer on my beloved Redskins to victory year after year after year. I am so grateful to be alive. I am grateful for the overflowing wealth of family and friends I am blessed to have in my life. I am so lucky to be able to share moments like the one this morning...to watch the sun rise while thousands of like-minded people march in unity, to feel the cool air on my face, to sing and laugh and love and skip and run and jump.

As I said, I don't usually spend too much time thinking about my "breast cancer survivor" status, but I do know this: cancer has definitely changed my outlook -- for the BETTER! I really do appreciate my life in ways I never could have imagined. I am a survivor determined to embrace everything that comes my way. The big things, and the little things, too. Because I know how precious life can be, I have been given the gift of perspective. I now know what is a "big thing" and what, frankly, doesn't matter all that much.

And so, while everyone knows what an absolute zealot I am about my Redskins, always remember I really do keep it all in check. I know what is important and what I can just laugh about and say, "Oh, well, better luck next time!" Life and love and family and friends -- big things. Redskins -- small thing.

But it WAS great to see that win today!

Despite the fact that this Redskin team seems intent on making my game-day experience so tense I'm nearly lightheaded at the end of every game, this one was well worth the pain. WHAT an inspired win, by a totally fired-up team. And against the hated Eagles, too. As my old Magic-8 ball used to say, "all signs point to yes"!

YES, this team is on the right track. YES, we made a good decision trading two draft picks for Donovan McNabb, even though he didn't exactly light it up today. YES, this is a team that wants to win. That is starting to play hard. That cares. YES, YES, and YES!

After that egg they laid last week, I confess to being a bit of a doubting Thomas about their chances against the Eagles today, but they defintely put my fears to rest. Those players rallied around Donovan McNabb and fought hard to be sure he left Philly with a win, and for that, I commend them.

Apparently, Shanahan got the players humming this week by asking them, "Anyone ever been fired?" To which most, if not all, of the players in that locker room dredged up their own past anguish and agonies over being cut from who-knows-what team, and made it their personal quest to ensure Donovan could walk out of the Vet tonight with his head held high and the Philly fans longing for his return. Who doesn't relish the idea of sticking it to their old boss (or ex-husband or old girlfriend or whomever has wronged us in the past) by showing them what they are missing? I'll take it, especially since it culminated in a much-needed road victory against a hated division rival!

So, the Skins are 2-2 after the first four games of the season, and are in first place (!!) in the NFC East. Not bad. We're making strides.

As always, there is room for improvement. I won't pick apart the play of the team, especially after such a sweet victory, except to say that Carlos Rogers has GOT to catch one of those interceptions someday or I'm going to have a nervous breakdown. JUST CATCH THE DAMN BALL! Can you imagine how much pain and suffering he might have prevented so many of us fans over the past five years if he would just do that one simple thing? And he wanted a pay-raise this year? Seriously, man. Get a grip.

But I digress. Let's leave all of the nit-picking for another day. Today is for celebrating. For savoring. For sticking it to some poor, grumbling Eagles fan.

FLY, EAGLES, FLY...away!

U-G-L-Y, you ain't got no alibi...you're UGLY! That about sums up how I feel right now about my beloved team, who really laid a serious egg yesterday and made a mockery of my recent optimism and belief in their (possibly) brighter future. Wow, was that bad!

OK, so maybe that 3-4 defense ISN'T a good fit for our current personnel. Maybe our offensive line is still a MAJOR work in progress. Perhaps Clinton Portis is injured or simply hated by Mike Shanahan. I don't know, but something was messing with their mojo yesterday in a big way. And boy, did it show.

I just don't get it. How can a team who has made such steady improvement over the past few months regress in such horrible fashion? It was Zorn-like, that loss. We were totally domintated in all three phases of the game. I had a bad feeling about things as soon as the punter went down and was helped off the field in tears. Yikes...I knew it was going to be a LONG day at that point, and that was hours before kick-off.

I don't have any summations to make today, unfortunately. There's not much you can take from a loss like this except that we are, clearly, NOT a very good team. And really, maybe it WAS too much to ask...that they could improve so markedly after such a dismal last season. I mean, they were 4-12 last year. That's bad. REALLY bad! So how can we go out and expect to dominate a team like the Rams? Guess what, folks? WE'RE the Rams. Bad. Possibly improving. But currently...BAD.

So, I'm grumpy. I'm irritated. I don't understand Mike Shanahan's cryptic press conferences where he gives conflicting information about players like Portis (first, he's injured, then, he's out due to "scheme" -- I mean, which is it??) And so, I'm doing my best not to jump to any conclusions at this point. I'm just going to retreat back to my usual doubting-Thomas nature until this team can go out and prove me wrong.

So there.

As a die-hard football fan, I get totally fired up for game days. Always have. To me, there is nothing quite like a Sunday in the fall -- gearing up for a full day of NFL football makes me downright giddy. But this year, it's been particularly sweet. I'm enjoying my "Redskin fandom" more than usual now that our team is beginning to perk up like Rumpelstiltskin after a long, 15-year sleep.

As a Redskin fan living in Anne Arundel County, MD, where Redskins and Ravens fans have co-existed rather peaceably for the most part, it's been a very tough slog of late. Ravens fans seem to have dominated the outdoor "airspace" around here and have made it pretty disheartening for Skins fans on game day Sundays. It's been so painful for me...driving to church on Sunday mornings seeing all those purple Ravens car flags flapping in the wind. Ravens jerseys in the grocery store. A whole Ravens TAILGATE DISPLAY in the local Giant (where, it should be noted, I'm NEVER shopping again!) For an area that is considered 1/2 Ravens and 1/2 Redskins, it hasn't always felt that user-friendly for the average Redskin fan. And so many of our bretheren have retreated -- back to their couches and backyards to cheer for the Skins privately, where we don't have to endure Ravens' fans pity and euphoria at our expense. (I, of course, NEVER retreated, as many of you know. I always have, and always will, wear my Skins attire on game days, I don't care HOW badly we've been playing. I have never shied away from taking my lumps as a die-hard fan, but it hasn't always been easy.)

Except the winds of change are blowing, folks. Out here in AA County, at least, our Skins fan base is waking up again. Yesterday, the anticipation in the air was palpable. I saw burgandy-and-gold car flags, Chris Cooley and Sean Taylor jerseys, and even Redskins CARS out yesterday, just crusing the area sharing their goodwill as fans with one another. It was a great morning of pre-game excitement for me -- beeping my horn in solidarity with other Skins fans in their cars, chatting with the supermarket checker wearing her Redskins necklace (at the SAFEWAY, where a Redskins fan can shop and feel united with other like-minded fans!), and even buying my son a Redskins ballon on our way out of the store. No more purple paraphenalia dominating the landscape -- it's a regular burgandy-and-gold resurgence out here and I'm loving every minute of it!

Isn't that one of your favorite parts of being a Skins fan? Doesn't it make your heart skip a beat when you see a total stranger wearing a Redskin jersey and you nod, smile, and maybe even exchange a joyful "Go, Skins!" on a Sunday morning at the Starbucks? Or slap a high-five with the attendant while pumping gas on your way to work? Maybe just a jubilant wave to another fan as you are driving to pick up the kids at school? It really is the epitome of fan-dom, in my opinion...it's what brings us together as fans in this otherwise busy and transient area of the country. Whole disparate factions of our local community united around a common goal -- our Redskins! And this year, with a team we can finally count on to take as much pride in wearing our colors as we fans do, doesn't it feel that much sweeter on Sunday mornings?

God, I'm exhausted. My voice is shot, my muscles ache from being so tense for so long, and I'm in serious need of something to help me calm down. It's been nearly 12 hours and my heart is still racing. Wow, that game against the Texans was intense!

OK, we lost. I know, I know...we not only lost, we blew a 27-10 lead and let the Texans storm back to score 20 unanswered points in the 4th quarter (and overtime) to beat us after our offense really put on a show -- something many of us haven't seen around here in a LONG time. And yes, our front 3 didn't get much pressure on Matt Schaub, our safeties gave up too many critical pass plays (including that killer 4th-down touchdown play to Andre Johnson that was akin to a dagger right through my heart!), and we had a totally make-able field goal blocked that probably would have ended the game for us. I hear you. And I know. It hurts.

But let's talk brass tacks here for a moment: did anyone really see this team turning around like they have so quickly? Did we really, as fans, believe Mike Shanahan, Bruce Allen et al would have been able to take that disatrous mess from last year -- the guys that went 4-12 under "groovy" Jim Zorn -- and mold them into this group of players who are motivated to win, care about the game, and take obvious pride in wearing the burgandy-and-gold? I have incredible faith in the Shanahan regime, and from reading my earlier posts, you know I'm a Shanahan believer, but not even in my wildest imaginings did I forsee such progress this early. It's been an amazing and happy surprise.

So, while we're all a bit let down today, and feeling the pain of all the what-ifs: what if we hadn't had that field goal blocked? What if we hadn't jumped off-sides and been able to score that touchdown in the fourth quarter? What if Gary Kubiak hadn't taken advantage of an archaic NFL rule and decided NOT to ice our kicker? Remember to try to remain optimistic. This loss is NOT like losses in recent years' past. This one doesn't spell doom. It doesn't reek of horrors yet to come. The Redskins are off to a GREAT start...the best one, in my opinion, in a good 10 years or so (remember, Marty started off 0-5!), and there is still a whole season of football left to play. Our team is going to improve. But we finally have a team of professionals, from top to bottom, that we can be proud of, and to me, that takes a least a little of the sting out of last night's loss.

Yup, that really happened last night. I know it seems like a dream, especially if, like me, you stayed up well past midnight to watch the Comcast post-game show and revel in all the debauchary that winning a game brings to this town. But your eyes did not deceive you...and Shanahan's new regime DID NOT disappoint. The Redkins really did beat the Cowboys on Sunday Night Football in front of a rowdy, loud and very pro-Redskins crowd!

It's been so long. Oh, it's been so long. It's been such a tough slog to get to this point, hasn't it? I know many fans of other teams are thinking, "Big deal...it's one win". But to be a Redskin fan in this town for as long as many of us have, this one was so, so sweet.

Granted, it wasn't pretty. And we can thank a few of Dallas' all-time stupidest play calls for helping us get that "W". I mean, really, Romo, why throw that lateral pass when you KNOW your teammate isn't going to score? And to the guy who caught the lateral (Choice, I think)...dude, just GET DOWN and fall on the ball. That's all you have to do. Even I know that, and I've never played a down of football in my life.

But it doesn't matter. None of Dallas' mistakes matter now, because our team finally, FINALLY, took advantage of another teams' misfortune and got a win. For the past 15 years or so, we have not been able to capitalize on other teams' mistakes. Mostly, we've been the ones MAKING them. Remember those back-to-back time outs? The punter trying to throw a touchdown pass? Forget it...let's not rehash it all. What's past is past. I've said it since the beginning of training camp, and I'll say it again now: Shanahan is a true professional, he coaches like a winner, and his team (both players and assistant coaches) is stepping up and responding.

We finally have a team we can believe in. Not necessarily to win every game -- I'm not that crazy. But we have a team that is well-coached. Prepared. Playing as a unit. Fired up and intense. Did you see that aggressive defensive scheme we were running? Did you see our players shuffling in and out without any delay of game penalties, false starts or other ridiculous gaffes or mishaps?

Shanahan is large and in charge, folks. He was prowling that sideline last night and I'm thinking, "I BELIEVE!" He's just one of those guys who looks like he knows what he's doing. And his demeanor is an antidote to too many years of complacency, unprofessionalism, and egoism. I trust him. His coaches and players trust him. He's a pro.

I know last night was the first game of a very long season, and anything can happen going forward. But for the first time in a long time, I feel like I can perhaps take a breath and exhale, knowing our team might finally be headed in the right direction!

Well, it's official. We are finally, FINALLY, talking about a football game that actually matters! After months of guess-work, a ton of speculation and a whole lot of hoping and praying, it all comes down to this: The Cowboys...on Sunday night... during kick-off weekend...at Fed-Ex Field (with our brand new video boards!)

It's what we've all been waiting for. This Sunday night, all will be revealed. Well, a LOT will be revealed. I tend to think our newly-revamped, much-improved (we hope) Redskins team is going to get better each week as this season progresses, but I also know we are going to see at least a little of the team's new identity, personality, and character when they take the field on Sunday. Shanahan's zone blocking and running schemes. Kyle Shanahan's down-field passing game. That new, much-discussed 3-4 defense we've been hearing so much about.

I know a lot of people are nervous about this game, and believe me, I'm feeling a bit queasy myself. Playing against the Cowboys is never easy, and this year's team looks pretty good. But honestly, don't you think it's better to go out there during our first game against a really good team (much as I hate to give the Cowboys ANY credit!) and really just lay it all on the line? I personally would much rather come out swinging against a tough opponent right out of the gate. Show the world what our new team is made of. Take our lumps, if necessary. Make our mark.

It's been a long, LONG off-season, and I for one am ready for some real smash-mouth, in-your-face football. I'm ready to see what all this off-season conditioning and positioning has done. No more press conferences. No more "what-if's". No more speculation. Let's stop talking and just get it DONE.

Dallas Cowboys, here we come!

I know this isn't really Redskins-related, but indulge me for just a moment: I've been watching the Hard Knocks training camp show with the Jets, and boy, is that one fascinating but REALLY uncomfortable show to watch.

I love the behind-the-scenes look at the players, what they go through in camp, how the practices are run, etc. The sounds, the close-ups -- that part is great, although if I'm the Jets, I'm worried about two things in particular: a) Jason Taylor is a spoiled brat who can't seem to tell time, and b) Mark Sanchez is either stupid or just really, really young and immature. If I'm a Jets fan, I'm hoping for the latter.

But seriously, where do some of these mangagement jokers come from? The Jets VP (Tannenbaum, I think is his name) seems like one of those people you see and you think, this guy has no soul. He just seems vapid. The guy is running a major sports franchise and he acts like a jerk most of the time. You know who he reminds me of? That guy in high school who no one liked but now is in a position of authority and is going to cram his power down your throat. Napoleonic, for sure. And Rex Ryan is a caricature of himself. Every time I watch that show, I keep staring at that "RR" pillow and thinking, who keeps a personally monogrammed PILLOW on a chair in their office? Wow.

Again, if I'm a Jets fan, I'm worried. The folks running the show at Jets palace seem to be in self-congratulatory mode and they haven't won a thing yet. They are all standing around patting themselves on the back for their great draft picks, etc., and they don't seem all that concerned about the fact that the team didn't play particularly well in pre-season.

I wonder what's going to happen this season. Will the Jets rally and be the team Rex Ryan and his management schmos think they will be? Or will they fall flat, and become the laughing stock of the NFL? Will the Jets faithful be left holding the bag, wishing HBO had picked some other team to profile during training camp this year?

And if Rex Ryan ever gets fired, will he take his pillow with him?

OK, so as much as I LOVE training camp (and I really, really do), I don't really like the "cut" days. It's the guilty mom in me, I guess. I just hate seeing all these good players work so hard all off-season, get a jersey with their name and number on the back, broil and sweat in the hot sun during training camp, and suffer through 4 miserable pre-season games, only to be sent packing at the end of it all. It's a brutal business, I know, and I guess these guys are used to it, but it still seems to me to be just a tad rough. Again, must be the female / mommy in me. No room for THAT on the football field...

In any event, it looks like we have a team, finally. After months of preparations, practices, and blood, sweat and tears, the Skins are finally, well...the SKINS!

Looking at the roster, I'm not moved in one direction or the other, really. All the good players we expected to make the team made it, and this year, even the "surprises" (i.e., Banks and Armstrong) got a bid, so we can't really complain too much. There's no Marcus Mason to kick around this year! And our practice squad is filled with all those players who got cut but looked right on the edge of making the team, too, so I'm feeling a little less guilty on their behalf. Especially after I saw that ditty about practice squad salaries -- I mean, hey, sign ME up for the practice squad! Not a bad way to make a living. Beats working (at a "real" job, I mean!)

So now, we wait. It's Dallas Week, which I'll write more about later, and it's the first real week of football, so all is finally right with the world again. I am salivating at the thought of this coming Sunday -- not just to watch the Redskins, which I'm thrilled about, of course -- but to see all our favorite football traditions re-appear. Jimmy, Howie and Terry on the set on Sunday morning. Highlights all day on every channel. And that AWESOME Monday Night Football intro (not Hank Williams Jr, just the old-school intro: dun, dun, dun, DUN!) It's so good, it almost makes me forget my guilt over all those players we cut!

Ravens, Redskins. Ho-hum. That's about how I feel about tomorrow's "rivalry" game -- the so-called "Battle of the Beltway". The media, always quick to coin a new phrase or create controversy, has been trying to drum up support for what has become an almost annual Ravens/Redskins pre-season game and frankly, I think it just falls flat.

I know a little something about this particular topic, living as I do in fragmented Anne Arundel county where Redskins and Ravens fans co-exist somewhat peacefully, in pockets, all over the area. When I moved out here from Northern Virginia, the very first thing I did was to conduct an informal, unscientific but highly significant (to me) poll of the local sports fan base. "Redskins or Ravens?", I'd ask...incessently, some might say. And I began to get a read on the lay of the land here. Ravens fans live mostly on the northern side of the county while Skins fans tend to reside in the south and east quadrants. Annapolis itself, to my untrained but persistent eye, tends more towards the purple crowd, but go 3 miles south to Edgewater and as the lady in the liquor store once told me, it's about 10 to 1, Redskins to Ravens. My daughter attends school at St. Mary's, one of the oldest schools in the area and located right in the heart of downtown Annapolis. Monday mornings during school drop-off last season were a lesson in humility for me, that's all I'm going to say about THAT. All my trash-talking about the Skins to all those Raven fans and all I got was laughed at for 16 miserable weeks. UGH. But I digress.

I have some personal knowledge of the split, too, because I married a Baltimore fan (notice I didn't say RAVENS fan...it took him a while to convert from his Colts "man-without-a-team" persona he wore like a hairshirt for 15 years). And my two brothers-in-law, their wives, and just about the whole "Bawlmer" clan I married into is obviously die-hard Ravens. And also -- and this is important -- die-hard ANTI-Redskins.

Any Redskin fan will tell you that really, they don't have any beef with the Ravens, or Baltimore itself, per se. I mean, what's not to like and respect, except maybe the fact that their uniforms are purple? (And that's really not their fault, I suppose. All the good football colors were already taken when they came along.) But talk to any, and I do mean ANY, Ravens fan...young or old, city or country, newly converted or old-school Colt holdovers, and they'll tell you this: they LOVE the Ravens with a passion only matched by the HATE they harbor towards the Redskins, their fans, and the whole DC area in general. Sort of the ugly-stepchild syndrome, except whenever I say that to my brothers-in-law, they always counter with, "See, spoken like a true ego-centric Reddskin fan" so perhaps I should find another metaphor.

My point is this: Ravens fans hate the Skins, and Skins fans are at worst ambivilant and at best respectful of the Ravens and their fans. Here's the deal: their organization is stellar. Their stadium rocks. Their defense is impervious. Their players are tough guys who play hard. And bottom line, they win. Lately, Skins fans can't say any of those things. We're living in the past, talking trash like it matters, while the Ravens keep plugging away, winning games, and sometimes stealing our fans right out from under our noses. And they're LOVING every minute of it. Apparently, this hatred has something to do with the fact that when the Colts left Baltimore, the Redskins were a winning franchise and we (supposedly) rubbed their noses in our succes. Talk to any Baltimore fan and he'll tell you two things: he hates the Redskins and their fans, and he loves the fact that we're in the toilet at present because we were so obnoxious to deal with for so many years.

So, what we're left with is a one-sided rivarly that just doesn't seethe or boil in any real sense. And even die-hard Ravens fans who hate the Skins know now that our team isn't any real threat to them -- anyone who watched what they did to us last November knows that. Ravens fans might hate the Skins and their fans, but they are secure in the knowledge that their team, at present, is better in all phases and it's not likely to change anytime soon. Shanahan is a good coach, but he can't work miracles.

I'm interested to see how Saturday night plays out, only for the simple fact that it is the second pre-season game and I'd like to see how our starters match up with one of the best defenses in the NFL. But the fact that that particular defense currently resides in Baltimore...eh, I can't get too excited about that part.

Well, my annual rite of passage has been completed. My four-year-old son and I schlepped out to Redskin Park on Sunday to watch the team up-close-and-personal -- well, as closely as possible from the vantage point fans are relegated to during practices -- and as usual it did not disappoint. Camp Shanahan. A new regime. Better and brighter days ahead. What a thrill! I swear, I never, EVER get tired of heading out to camp each summer. I'd go more often if I wasn't bogged down with all sorts of obligations in my "real life". I could stand there all day watching quarterbacks throw endless passes...running backs scurrying around pretending to carry the ball...and of course, the piece-de-resistance, those famous 11-on-11 drills. I mean, seriously. It's just good, clean fun. And with all of the changes wrought after this year's busy (and hopefully productive) off-season, you could almost feel the electricity in the air.

This year was particularly enjoyable because the practice I attended was in the afternoon, which is usually a killer because of the heat and humidity but this year was actually quite comfortable. The cloud cover kept things nice and shady, and I think the rain might have scared away a number of my fellow fans because there weren't as many people as I expected on a weekend day near the end of camp. Not having to endure the elements made focusing on the actual practice a whole lot easier.

As usual, I definitely made an impression on my fellow campers -- "Who's #11?" someone would ask..."Devin Thomas", I'd answer in my usual nosy but oh-so-helpful way. Doling out out useful camp-specific advice to the uninitiated, i.e, "The defense wears RED during practice" certainly gets you attention, particularly when you are a woman! I always think it's so funny when men, especially, do a double-take when a female fan demonstrates her sports acumen. Fortunately, Redskin fans - particularly those at camp -- are a congenial bunch who generally know their stuff, as a rule, so I usually make a few pals before camp is over each year. This year was no different. The lady standing next to me as practice was ending and the players were walking up the sidewalk to the locker room started calling out, "Santana, Santana!" and I said, quietly, "That's not Santana. That's Larry Johnson." Believe me, she was grateful...players don't really like being called by the wrong name, and once I corrected her and called out the right name, he actually came over to sign autographs for us. THANK YOU, mommyskinsfan!

Having my little four-year-old with me certainly made this year's camp experience more fun, too. Even though he sometimes seemed more interested in playing with my iphone than watching practice, he was still quite a hit with the other fans (see photos). We took turns holding him up so the players might see him and come over to sign autographs -- shameless, I know, but hey, a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do. He IS cute in his #21 Sean Taylor jersey! Pretty good stuff all around!

All in all, I'd say a good time was had by all during our annual camp visit. Now, it's on to the Ravens. More on that later!

Skins 42, Buffalo 17! Yup, you read it right, folks...the Redskins not only won their pre-season opener Friday night, they totally dominated Buffalo in all three phases of the game. For the first time in a long, long, LONG time, the Skins manhandled another team. And yes, for the record, I know it's preseason. I know it doesn't count. I KNOW it was our 3rd-stringers against their 3rd-stringers for a lot of the second half.

But still.

They won. And won big. And looked pretty good doing it! OK, actually, they looked a bit shaky at the outset - the defense looked a little soft (against a not-so-great quarterback in Trent Edwards) and our special teams dropped a kick-off return and bobbled a punt. But then something happened, and they seemed to wake up. They shook off the rust after those first few minutes of half-hearted effort, and suddenly, they began playing with a certain efficiency and crispness I haven't seen out of any Redskin team in, well, I'm almost afraid to say how long. It's been a LONG time, let's leave it at that.

This team began to play together. Here's the thing -- I have had to reset my expectations for this team over the past decade because they have been so pitiful to watch. My threshold for them is pretty low at this point. Now, when our offense breaks the huddle, walks to the line of scrimmage, runs a play without any penalties or flags, and the play actually WORKS, well, then, I'm happy. Thrilled. Estatic.

Yes, I know...that's what a football team is supposed to do. But anyone who has had to suffer through the past few years around here knows that to accomplish even these small feats of offensive banality should be considered a step in the right direction. And then, to put together a drive all the way down the field that actually culminated in a touchdown (a real, live touchdown, people! Not a field goal...not 4th-and-goal and turn it over on downs. An actual 6-point touchdown. Oh, and we made the PAT, too!) Well, it was all almost too much for me.

Please understand: I'm not saying I suddenly think we're going to the Superbowl anytime soon. I'm not going to perpetuate the stereotype held dear by legions of Redskin fan-haters that says we win one game and we're Superbowl bound, baby. Not this time, anyway. It's been too brutal for too long around here for me to fall prey to the myth that things might actually change. I've been burned too many times...seduced by too many "new regimes" that fell flat to think that this time it might actually be the real thing.

But I CAN say with a certain degree of cautious optimism that it sure is nice to watch our offense walk onto the field and run play after play after play without endless false-starts, 3-and-outs, holding penalties, and gadget plays that don't work. It was nice to sit on my couch Friday night watching the game and realizing I wasn't holding my breath, gritting my teeth, or pacing the floor in agony. Quite the opposite, in fact. I was (gasp) enjoying myself! Football was actually fun again.

So, let's wait and see what this Saturday brings. Perhaps another efficient offensive performance might convert me into a believer. But for now, I'm just saying -- it's nice to watch this team play again.

Driving home from South Carolina on Saturday after our family vacation, I couldn't help but feel excited. Not only were the Skins back in training camp (hooray!) but Russ Grimm was going to be inducted into the Hall of Fame that evening. I couldn't wait to watch his speech that evening, and as expected, he didn't disappoint.

Grimm's tribute to Redskins' fans was heartfelt. He evoked memories held dear by so many of us true fans -- RFK Stadium rockin' to the famous "We want Dallas" chant. That awesome seat cushion game. The diesel horn blowing as 44 carried the ball up field. I love that Grimm is such a team guy. He and his fellow Hogs defined the Skins winning teams, and they are proud to be a part of the burgandy and gold. How great is that? I love Russ Grimm's pride, his simple approach to winning, his determination, his grit. I love that he's not afraid to stand up and say, hey, I'm a Redskin. I've always been a Redskin, and I always will be. It's about pride, plain and simple.

I know many Skins fans are tired of living in the past, and I obviously agree. I want a winning team this year and in the future as much as the next fan. But I can't help but feel a sense of connection to the past when I see guys like Russ Grimm stand up and say "We were winners, and this is what it took to be a winner." We need more of that on our team this year.

Stay tuned...I'm heading to training camp this Sunday to check out the team in person. I'm bringing my video camera to post some footage of my trip -- let's hope my camera doesn't get confiscated in the process!

It's the MOST wonderful time of the year! Well, for football fans it is. And for me, it DEFINITELY is. This is it...training camp has officially begun! All of the waiting, the watching, the wondering and the hoping will finally be put to rest. Well, maybe not the hoping, but the waiting and the wondering can now be replaced with real, solid football. In the flesh. For keeps. Helmet to helmet. Shoulder pad to shoulder pad. It's for real, folks. It counts. Well, it sort of counts...but let's not get picky.

Wow, I'm so excited I can barely think straight. I'm overwhelmed with what the beginning of training camp really means for this team. New beginnings. Fresh starts. It all begins anew...today!

And guess what? I'm back in the saddle now, too. Listening to my sports talk radio stations for any and all updates on camp practices. Staying up late to watch the local cable coverage from the "Redskins Broadcast Network", such as it is. Reading each and every blog post entry on the Washington Post website. I can talk football again and not be stared at like I'm a lunatic because it's only March and no one cares. It's OK now -- the "season" has officially begun. I can come back out of hibernation and embrace my Redskins for real.

I'm back, baby...I'm back!

It won't be long now. Training camp is only DAYS away, and I'm getting excited. Thrilled, actually! And not just because football season is starting up again, although I'm obviously nearly beside myself about that part of it. It's also that when I think about why I really love football, I realize that it's something I enjoy doing that doesn't have much, if anything, to do with my "regular" life...the life in which I cook, clean, play chauffeur, and take care of children for much of each and every day.

I like having a passion that is totally removed from the daily grind of my life as a mom. I guess that's why most people love sports, or any hobby, really -- it's an escape from their everyday reality. And that's why I love football...watching it, following it, reading about it, even writing about it. It's different. It's unique. And it's totally mine. Not much else in my life these days is just about (or for) me, but my passion for football and the Redskins is completely and totally my own. I don't have to share it, unless I want to (and living in a house with a husband who grew up in Baltimore, I can assure you he's not real interested in sharing this part of my life with me!) I'm on-duty as a mom and wife 24-hours a day, and for the most part, my life revolves around the 3 other people who live in my house. But this is something that I don't have to share with them, or anyone. It's just for me.

Which I guess many of you cynics out there might argue is a GOOD thing, considering how I often behave when the Skins lose a game (which has been often over the past few years, I realize). But even still, I like having a hobby and a passion that allows me time to disengage from my everyday life and just let loose. Be free. Be myself. If only for a little while.

Let's hope this year, the Skins give me something to really escape to -- a winning season!

Watching the last game of the season a few years back, I was reminded once again how frustrating it can be to be a dedicated fan. The Redskins were playing well, and actually WINNING! Had they been able to win a few more games earlier in the season, they might have had a chance to make the play-offs This was the team I had expected to see all season, the team I schlepped from Annapolis to Ashburn in the sweltering heat of August to watch during training camp...the team I bravely defended in the face of blistering attacks from Ravens fans in my mixed Redskins/Ravens Maryland neighborhood. I watched helplessly as the Skins pulled off a stunner of a win, but it wouldn't matter. They were going home, and the other teams (many of which I HATED!) were moving on to the playoffs.

Oh, the joy of watching them take to the field with such fearless abandon! It was magical, especially when the defense sacked the opposing quarterback, recovered the fumble and rumbled to the end-zone to set up the game’s only touchdown. It had been weeks – months, really – since I had enjoyed myself this much watching the Redskins play. Instead of waiting for the other shoe to drop (or a field goal to bump off the goal post, a fumble to fall into the hands of the other team, or any number of other hapless calamities to befall them), I was actually having fun! Why, I wondered, couldn’t they have played with this kind of fire earlier in the season? Where was this team earlier in the season? Why, oh why, couldn’t they have won just one more of those close games back in October?

Of course, you know the end of this tale. The Redskins were eliminated from playoff contention once again, making their post-season appearances VERY few and far between over the past 15 years. And the hopes of thousands of Redskins fans were shelved for another off-season, during which we will all ruminate and speculate and hope and pray and gear up for next year. The hardiest fans might suffer significant withdrawal at first, meeting in the blog spots to chat about Redskins draft picks, the Senior Bowl and the new coaching staff. Other, more casual fans simply move on to other sports without much fanfare, perhaps even occasionally throwing on their Redskins baseball caps without even a hint of angst. But most, if not all of us, will continue to ponder what might have been, at least for a little while.

And so, I thought about the trials of being a die-hard Redskin fan. It’s easy for the casual observer to laugh it off and say, “There’s always next year!” But for those of us who truly love our teams, that sentiment simply won’t be enough. We’ll fret and we’ll worry and we’ll argue and we’ll listen for any scrap of information we can find about our teams. And to add insult to injury, we’ll have to suffer through the indignity of other fans’ ecstasy, as their teams move through the playoffs on the annual march toward the Super bowl. In some ways, it can be a relief to be released from the anguish of it all, especially since the Redskins, at least, never seem to really dominate anymore, and when they have made the playoffs recently fans are left holding their breath until they are eventually and inevitably eliminated. In some ways, it's easier to just enjoy playoff football without all the stress. But it's not nearly as much fun. And it certainly can't take the sting out of a day in December that started out with so much promise, and turned out to just be too-little, too-late!

About this time in the summer, I start to get antsy. Yes, the weather is warm, the kids are out of school, and it's time to relax. For most people, anyway. Cook-outs, lazy days by the pool, and cold beer...they all scream "summer is here" for the average mom. And I can enjoy these things, up to a point. But in the back of my mind, the clock has started to tick. I try to push the thoughts away, but they inevitably keep crowding back into my brain. Because while the lazy days of summer have definitely arrived, the countdown to kick-off for me has already begun.

I'm not talking about the start of the football season, at least not in the sense many people think of when that first whistle blows on the field and the games actually count. I'm talking about one of MY favorite times of the year: TRAINING CAMP!

Yup, I'm ready. Ready for the silence at Redskins Park to be broken. Ready for the heat and humidity to shimmer over the grassy fields, for the players to hose off their sweaty heads with those hose-nozzle contraptions they use during practice, for the live local radio coverage to begin. I'm ready for players whose names no one has ever heard of to take the field. I'm ready to watch 3rd-string quarterbacks to throw long, arching passes to 3rd and 4th-string receivers. I'm ready to root for underdog players who are long-shots to make the team, the ones the media trumps as the "hard-workers" and "character guys" most people know nothing about. I'm ready to stand in the baking sun with my binoculars up-close-and-personal with ten thousand other Redskin fans watching players stretching on the field. "One, Two, Three...huh. Two, Two, Three...HUH!"

I love it. Training camp is the REAL start of football season, at least for me. I love that day in late July when I turn on the news and they're showing footage of the players carrying their stereos and suitcases into some local hotel to begin their stay at camp...one of the oldest traditions in football. I love the guys carrying their clothes in a pillowcase, and the ones wearing those huge headphones and rocking their heads to the beat while refusing to acknowledge the cameras. I love turning on my local sports talk radio station in the car and hearing that first LIVE broadcast from Redskins Park!

Oh, the excitement...the expectation! Training camp is filled with promise, buoyed with the sense that everyone is starting over...that last year's horrible gaffes and major mistakes have all been forgiven and forgotten. Training camp is a fresh start, a new beginning, the dawning of a new day. It's a time for optimism. A time for good cheer. The past has been wiped away, and anything is possible. Who doesn't get excited about that??

I know, I know, it's ridiculous to start obsessing about training camp -- TRAINING CAMP -- where nothing actually counts and many players will be back bagging groceries and selling cars by fall, this early, but that is my lot in life and I have come to accept it. Every year, usually around Memorial Day, when everyone else is gearing up for summer vacation and splashing in the pool, I begin my quiet countdown. "How many more days until they release the training camp schedule? What days will I attend this year? Will there be morning AND evening practices?" I wonder. And I wait. And I surreptitiously check the Redskins website for tidbits of information so I can start planning, organizing, and cleaning off those binoculars...

About six weeks and counting -- the countdown has begun!

I love football. More specifically, I love REDSKIN football. I love everything about the team that has become my obsession for the past 20 years. I admit it...I am totally nuts. Everyone who knows me knows I am completely and totally crazy for anything and everything burgandy-and-gold (for the uninitiated, those are the Redskins colors). This is a blog about my hobby...my obsession...my die-hard fanaticism of the team I love. Join me on my wild ride through the football season and beyond. I guarantee you won't be disappointed, even if you ARE a Dallas fan, or even if you hate football altogether (gasp!)

I often say I'm the only mom in the pre-school carline pick up who listens to sports talk radio instead of The Wiggles. It's true. (That line, by the way, won me tickets a few years ago to a Redskins game when I was selected as one of the "craziest 'Skins fans" in DC by that very same sports talk radio station. I even got to go down on the field to watch the players warm up before the game...talk about a dream come true!)

I'm the crazy fan who watches all the games alone because I can't stand having anyone talk to me while the Skins are on the field. I watch hours of pre- and post-game coverage of each and every Redskin's game, including the preseason. I blog, I "chat" with other fans, and I sometimes even call in to the local sports talk radio station to vent if I'm really upset after a game.

Speaking of the games, I never, ever, EVER miss one. If we have family obligations or other events on Sundays when the Skins are playing, I either don't go, or I go and hover by any TV I can find to make sure I don't miss one snap. It infuriates me when people call my house when the Redskins are playing. I can't understand why people keep doing it, especially since I either won't answer the phone or I'm so rude I tend to scare people off. (You know who you are, people!)

I religiously follow a number of Redskin blogs and "insider" sites to ensure I am up-to-date on all the latest info on the team, even during the off-season. For me, there IS no off-season. I scrape and claw for any nugget of info I can find about the Skins, all year long. It never gets old.

It's weird, this obsession of mine, but I've come to embrace it. I love how being a crazy fan of a team like the Redskins makes me feel connected. Being a Redskin fan means being part of a community. It's a shared history between me and all of those other fans out there who love the team as much as I do. It's the promise of the future. There is tradition. There is pagentry. There is intrigue. You never know what the next season, the next game, the next play, will bring. How can you not get excited about that?

Of course, there are downsides. Like, say, being a fan of a team that hasn't won anything of import since 1992 -- my senior year of college. Or having to always remind Redskin haters of the "glory days", while knowing all the while how pathetic I sound.

Oh yes, there is heartbreak. But nothing in life is worth doing if it isn't done fully, with heart, with purpose, with optimism. That's how I view my "fan-dom"...it's part of the fabric of who I am. And I'm proud of it, even if I do look like an idiot on game days sometimes. That's a price I'm willing to pay...for the team I love.